Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Funny

I got this from Alana and it is just too good not to try.

Go to www. urbandictionary. com and type in your answer to each question in the search box, then write the FIRST definition it gives you...



1) Your name? J(abbreviated to protect the more-or-less innocent)

A girl that works in a shop and is very lazy. (Better than the second definition, at least: One who has an extemely large ass.)


2) Your Gender? Girl

The creation of satan. designed to destroy the existence of mankind.


3) One of your friends? Missy

Girls who like to run around naked and throw their clothes into trees (actually, I'm breaking the rules here for my own pleasure -- this is the second definition. The first definition was: Noun, Person, Informal)


4) What should you be doing? Working

A term to describe the tedious and boring indentured servitude that most people are forced to endure to get money. Generally, not a pleasant experience.


5) Favorite color? Purple

Extremely potent marijuana, specifically marijuana buds that have a purple hue to them. Also accompanied by a fragant, usually fruity smell and mad perma-grin.


6) Where were you born? Maryland

The state with the biggest identity crisis in America. Parts of it like DC and Baltimore are extremely ghetto, with two of the top 5 murder rates in the country. Balto is the heroine capital of the world. Suburbs like Potomac are Bethesda are among the richest and most well educated in the country, and populated by lawyers and doctors with preppy rich children who drive Benz's. To the far west, you have the type of hicks that live in West Virginia up in the Appalachian mountains. To the south and the east you have the kind of hicks you might find in Mississippi. In Ocean City you have retired people who decided to go live on the beach. Around the bay area, you have a lot of fisherman. Maryland may be mixed up, but the crabs are damn good.


7) Month you were born? November

The most popular form of rain when getting married to a hot and sexy rockstar.


8) Last person you talked to/texted on the phone? M(abbreviated to protect the not-really-innocent-at-all)

A dirty **** who stinks really ******* bad
(jeez, someone must have dated a person of this name and had it end very badly, because there is a lot of hate in that definition)


9) Your pet's name? Lulu

A character from Final Fantasy X who is borderline goth, uses dolls as weapons, and is as volumptuous as f***.
(Can you spell I-L-L-I-T-E-R-A-T-E? Good, now spell "voluptuous.")


10) Your last name? B(abbreviated...well, you know why)

The famed [creature]-like creature popularized in such video games as [name of a collection of video games]. This is the pre-royalty title of the villian. He lived with his parents until he was 25, brooding on his own inadequacy. When he inherited his rich grandmother's isolated castle located past [??] infested deserts, caves, and mountains, he decided it was time to look for company. His obsession with [fake royalty] eventually led to him meeting [a character] and they instantaneously became rivals for her affection. But we all know it is [another character] who does all the work.
What?
No you suck.
(seriously, that's how this definition ended)

2 comments:

pittmane said...

Mine was better!
1) Name: Erin
Ireland; a person's, mostly girl's name
However, I really liked the 3rd definition better:
an extremely aweome girl with talent, humor, and bueaty.

2) Gender: Female
Most definately the finest thing ever created

3) Friend: Erica
Erica is hott, you know, sexy, a bingy, bonger, yeah b*tch, jealous much? me ish thought so, ho ho ho! you ho. yeah s*ck it (???!!! I wonder if Erica knows this???)

4) Should be doing? reading
rich white town in mass dominated by:
-soccer mom's stopping in the middle of traffic to give you information about your own family
-cops who have nothing better to do than find the best places to hide with their radar guns
-the boy's hockey team and football team
-teenagers who buy sh*tty overpriced pot using their parents money
-golden retrievers

5) Favorite Color: blue
The hue of the portion of the visible spectrum lying between green and indigo, evoked in a human observer by radiant energy with wavelengths of approximately 420 to 490 nanometers.

6) Where born: Loveland
An insane maniac; a danger to himself and others. A loose cannon. Named for B. Loveland of La Crosse, WI.

7) Birth Month: July
Sorry but first definition (7th month of the year) was just no fun at all, so I have to go with definition two:
A month when mostly the hottest girls are born
That girls so hot she must be born in July

8) Last person talked to on phone: Amy
to take, hold, or steal your heart. a person who is a soulmate. a good lover.

9) Pet's name: Baxter
A Baxter is the character in every romantic comedy who is the "sensible" choice. He/she is the current boyfriend/fiance of one of the main characters, who gets left at the altar/airport/wedding rehearsal when the main character realizes she's in love with the unpredictable passionate romantic interest.

"..the minute you see them, you know they're wrong, ... The instant they walk on the screen, they give you some information that immediately makes the audience turn to the person sitting next to them and say, 'He's wrong for her. It'll never work out.” --Michael Showalter--

10) Last name: P___
A moronic decision involving the ruthless advancement of your already tattered yet gigantic ego. A way of acting which is superiorly ignorant and blind to any abstract ways of thinking except how cool cartoons are when you are high.
IE A bonehead move.
IE Incarcerating yourself in a life of short term happiness and dead end goals which will result in heavy drug use and alcoholism once your wife hits 300lbs and starts beating your @ss with a broomstick.

Melanie said...

That was hilarious!